Uncomfortable? Bag it… or BRING IT!
I recently started going to a yoga class- a pretty radical move for this totally left brained, over achieving, bookworm science nerd. Not to worry, I’m not turning all granola headed- I have a very specific reason for going. My science nerd past didn’t include a lot of physical activity. So one side effect is that I possess the flexibility of a 2×4. I’m also a ballroom dance addict, and it’s getting to the point where my lack of flexibility is preventing the improvements I’d like to make in my dancing.
Because I’m so inflexible I totally suck at yoga. Instead of gracefully and fluidly moving from one pretzel shape to another I wind up looking more like the pathetic pile of the broken bits at the bottom of the bag. And the worst part is that even my twisted, distorted pathetic imitations of yoga poses are uncomfortable for me to hold for very long. In fact, I’ve tried it a couple of times before and gave up.
This is human nature. We try something once or twice- and when we can’t do it perfectly immediately, the voices in our head start: “What was I thinking? I’m no good at this” We don’t like feeling like we can’t do something- it’s uncomfortable. So too often we quit.
In Western culture, at least, we have come to believe that feeling uncomfortable is to be avoided at all costs. We seem to think that everything should flow easily and effortlessly. We look at people who we deem successful and our belief is that they achieved their success effortlessly, painlessly and instantaneously.
But this belief is NOT reality. The reality is that successful people worked hard. They got up earlier, studied more, practiced more, wrote more. When things got hard, they brought it. They continued to push just beyond where they felt comfortable… into * GASP * uncomfortable territory!
It is only by experiencing discomfort that we improve. If a weightlifter wants to be able to lift more weight, he can’t just keep lifting what is comfortable. He has to push just beyond his comfort zone to cause his muscles to grow stronger. If a runner wants to improve her speed, she can’t just continue to run at a comfortable pace. She has to constantly push herself to run faster than feels comfortable so her body can handle more speed. The salesman has who wants to make more sales must continually push himself to find ways to make more sales calls- and hear “no” more in order to sell more.
Let’s face the facts- the only things we were born knowing how to do is cry and mess up a whole bunch of diapers. Everything else had to be learned- by pushing into uncomfortable territory, falling on our butts, getting up and trying again.
So, I’m getting up and trying again. I’ve found a different place to work on yoga, and a teacher who jives really well with me. I don’t like being uncomfortable. But I dislike the feeling of failure and quitting even less. So I’m forging ahead, pushing into discomfort. I’m not going to bag it. I’m going to bring it.
What about you? What discomfort it looming for you? You have a choice
Bag it. Run from it. Avoid any feeling of discomfort at all costs.
OR
Bring it. Embrace it. Reject conventional wisdom and come to know discomfort as your friend.
What will you choose?
“come to know discomfort as your friend.” Yes, this is the heart of yoga.
As a life-long practitioner and once-upon-a-time yoga teacher, I want to gently dissuade you from the notion that one can “totally suck at yoga.” Such a thing is impossible. As a brilliant yoga teacher once told me, “the truth is not on the floor.”
No matter what the person’s outer appearance in a pose, all that matters is what’s going on within. Because of this, it can be easier to approach the essence of yoga as a beginner, because the interesting zone where one does the “work” is so much easier to find.
It’s best not to compare yourself to others, or even to how you yourself were experiencing a pose at any point in time. Let yoga bring you into the present. It’s not about mind over body; yoga is about the union of mind and body.
I love what you’ve written about embracing discomfort and very happy that you’ve decided to find a yoga teacher who is a good fit for you!
Namaste!
Thanks for your insights. I guess I was referring to how I felt in the few classes I’ve tried before. I always felt like a lumbering Rhinoceros. Everybody else in the room seemed to do the poses so easily. I suspect many people feel the same way at first. I do have a fairly competitive personality and at this point am doing it more for the flexibility benefit than for the mental. Maybe this will also help me learn to turn down the gazillion random thoughts that are always running around in my head!